The best way for adults to live: no argument, no entanglement, no competition.
Good morning, accompany you to read.
have read such a story.
when a snake was passing through a certain section of the road, its body was accidentally cut by a saw on the ground.
in retaliation, he turned and bit the saw.
as a result, the saw was unscathed, but it hurt its mouth.
the snake red eyes and wrapped the saw tightly with its whole body.
in the end, he used up all his strength and didn't hurt the saw. Instead, he was sawed to death.
in reality, we are just like this snake a lot of times.
those injuries are one-off, but because of your obsession, it continues to cause you more pain.
people who are really mature will never fight with life blindly.
but know how to keep peace of mind, stay away from bad people and bad things, and know how to let go of yourself.
the best way for adults to live is not to argue with bad people, not to struggle with bad things, and not to compete with themselves.
01
not arguing with bad people is a sober
writer who once talked about his father's stroke.
once, at the gate of the neighborhood, his father saw a young man parking his car on a narrow sidewalk. Pedestrians had to make a detour.
when his father saw this, he kindly went over to persuade the young man.
but the young man rolled his eyes and refused to drive away.
the two quarreled there, and the young man finally became angry and shouted, "if you have nothing to do, get out of the way."
when my smooth father heard this, his blood pressure rose and his heart was so blocked that he soon had a stroke and was hospitalized.
later, Pingkingshun said with emotion that the biggest mistake my father made was trying to influence a scoundrel with reason.
Carnegie once said, "the only way to win an argument is to avoid it."
very often, arguing with unreasonable people is often time-consuming and laborious, which is not only meaningless, but also brings disaster to yourself.
living in the world, not wasting breath with bad people is not only sober, but also a rare wisdom of life.
Yang Jiang once recorded such a thing.
in a special era, a female student reprimanded her for spreading inappropriate thoughts and speeches, which caused harm to the students' mental health.
in the face of vilification for no reason, Yang Jiang can confront and defend herself.
but Yang Jiang chose to be silent: I don't argue with anyone, and I disdain to argue with anyone.
Yes, what's the use of more arguments? it will only make things worse and make it difficult to end.
there is a good saying: always compete with others, don't argue with fools.
porcelain should never go head-to-head with bricks. If you compete with people at different levels and win or lose, it will only keep lowering your level.
instead of arguing endlessly, learn to be silent and patient.
settle down, think more rationally, and devote yourself to self-cultivation. This is the rare sobriety of a person.
02
it is wise not to wrestle with bad things.
there was a saying on the Internet:
A lot of injuries are one-off, but with your permission, it is like a saw, constantly pulling on your heart, and the person who clings to the saw is actually you.
in the movie I am not Pan Jinlian, the heroine Li Xuelian discussed a fake divorce with her husband in order to avoid paying a fine because she wanted to have a second child.
did not expect that her husband really did it. He took the opportunity to abandon Li Xuelian and turned around to marry another woman.
she was so angry that she filed a complaint against her ex-husband in court.
the court ruled against her, but Li Xuelian was not convinced.
she filed a lawsuit from a small county all the way to Beijing, suing, losing, and then suing again and again.
for more than ten years, her life has become restless, and the best time of her life has been exhausted.
she was young and beautiful, willing to work hard, and could have lived a good life without her ex-husband.
but because of my obsession, I have been entangled in this stupid thing all the time, and I can only scribble for the rest of my life.
there is a good saying: "when you stare at the abyss, the abyss stares at you."
people live in the world, we will all encounter all kinds of bad things, if always entangled, then we will always live in the haze.
was ridiculed and immediately prepared a hundred sarcastic words to retaliate, resulting in deep hostility;
was bumped, and then doubled his revenge, resulting in irreconcilable contradictions;
was snubbed once, immediately vowed to be distant from each other forever, and the relationship became more and more stiff.
the more you dwell on one thing, the worse and worse things await you.
as the saying goes: don't cry over spilled milk, don't dwell on irreparable crap.
learn to get out in time in order to avoid greater trouble and injury.
take a look away from the bad things that have happened, and play down the bad things that cannot be changed.
Life is too short to focus on yourself and live your life instead of dwelling on meaningless things.
03
not competing with yourself is a relief.
there is a topic on Weibo: why do people often feel pain?
one comment poignantly wrote: it's because you want to control everything you can't control at all.
most of the troubles in life come from our own quarrels with ourselves.
colleagues are smallI have enjoyed an experience of my own every week.
five years ago, she worked for a newspaper in Beijing. At a meeting one morning, she was suddenly questioned by her leader about an important person to be interviewed.
due to lack of preparation, she stumbled in her answer.
although the leaders and colleagues said nothing, Xiao Zhou felt that they could detect a lot of hidden meaning from their eyes and movements.
then unwittingly associate with yourself.
"he just glanced at me. Is he laughing at me?"
"the leader frowned and didn't have any thoughts about me, did he?"
with all kinds of thoughts and emotions, Xiao Zhou stayed up until work.
when she got home, she lay in bed, turning off the lights and getting ready to go to bed, but she became anxious again at the thought of her performance at today's meeting and the interview she would face tomorrow.
as a result, I couldn't sleep until 2: 00 in the morning.
the next day she went out with red eyes, still thinking about yesterday, and the interview was very unsatisfactory.
Xiao Zhou told me that at that time she often had a hard time with herself and always liked to cut corners and suffered a lot of losses.
I have heard a saying: life is not difficult, just don't compete with yourself, always teach the real me a lesson with the ideal me.
in many cases, if you compete too much with yourself, you will often have internal friction and put yourself in chains.
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living a life is not a war, and there is no need for tension.
learn to let go of too many demands, accept the temporary deficiency of your ability, and try to shake hands with yourself.
when you let go of your burden and build a leisurely mind, you can be a free person.
▽
there is a good saying: "what kind of pattern you have, what kind of destiny you have."
most of the time, we don't have a good life, all because we are obsessed with life and can't let it go.
on the surface, it is a bad state of mind, but in fact it is more limited by vision and pattern.
when you stand at the foot of the mountain, there is a hustle and bustle of right and wrong, and you can only follow the heated debate and worry about the noise of the world.
only when you stand high enough to hold mountains and rivers in your eyes, can you stay away from all bad people and things and know how to live in harmony with yourself.