True maturity: small temper, little expectation, good mindset

there is a saying in Cai Gentan: "years are long, but busy people promote themselves; heaven and earth are wide, but I am narrow."

means that time is long, but busy people feel short; heaven and earth are broad, and narrow-minded people feel cramped.

the more mature a person is, the more likely he is to ask himself inward and ask himself where he hasn't done enough.

instead of blaming society for being untolerant, others are not kind enough, and the environment is not loose enough.

Yi Shu has a famous saying: "A mature person often finds that there are fewer and fewer people to blame, and everyone has his own difficulties."

achieving the following three points is the beginning of true maturity:

have no temper, have less expectation, and have a good mindset.

01

temper, getting smaller and smaller

there is a very popular saying:

first-class people are capable, but have no temper.

A second-class person has the ability and temper.

third-class people have no ability and no temper.

fourth-class people are incompetent and have a bad temper.

this is what du Yuesheng said. He read countless personal experiences from the bottom of society.

A person's mental maturity has nothing to do with age. First of all, it depends on whether he has a temper.

it is childish behavior to get angry easily.

in the Romance of the three Kingdoms, although Liu Bei made great achievements in crusading against the yellow towel, he only sealed a county lieutenant.

shortly after taking office, a postal supervisor humiliated Liu Bei in public because he did not receive a bribe from him.

after hearing this, Zhang Fei tied the governor's post to a willow tree outside the county Yamen and beat him up.

when I read this paragraph when I was young, I only felt happy when I saw it.

when I look at it again in middle age, I feel that it is Zhang Fei's anger that finally killed him.

Zhang Fei ordered Zhang Da and Fan Jian to supervise military affairs, and the whole army made white flags and white armour within three days, which they simply could not complete.

the two hesitated a little, and Zhang Fei angrily pulled out each of them to beat 50 big whips.

Zhang Da and Fan Jian thought that they were both dead, so they simply took advantage of Zhang Fei's drunkenness, cut off his head and defected Sun Quan.

Zhang Fei's death is described as resentment in two words.

there is a Korean proverb: "if you kick a stone in anger, it is your toes that hurt."

temper is a double-edged sword that not only hurts others, but also divides one's own life.

on the contrary, those who can control their temper will eventually become winners.

people with mature mentality will have less and less temper.

because the more mature people are, they are concerned about the success or failure of the overall situation, long-term interests, and the ability to contain anger.

Are you prepared to look drop dead gorgeous with our exquisite short plus size gown for bride at your upcoming event? Here are the absolute best choice to make you shine!

anger is easy to get angry, but the consequences of anger are unimaginable.

British writer Weherzlitt said: a good temper is a wealth of life.

capable people tend to be mature, able to hold their temper and control themselves.

02

expect less and less of others

Why are we always full of expectations of others?

expect praise, recognition, care and care from others, and you will find that the more you expect, the more disappointed and vulnerable you will be.

in the TV series "ordinary Glory", Gao Sicong is the "three high" tags of high birth, high education and high IQ, and seems to be the right winner in life.

if you have a little success in your work, you are eager to be recognized by the leadership.

but the leader's response is always cold, thinking that it is his duty to do a good job.

Gao Sicong was hit hard and felt that his intelligence was buried because he was not appreciated by the leader. He wrote a letter of resignation and was always ready to leave.

the leader saw the clue and reminded him that he is no longer a student and should not always expect awards from others.

when a person no longer has expectations of others, it is a person's real growth.

expecting to win the approval of others is a kind of lack of self-confidence and a sign of a lack of confidence.

expect others, it is better to learn to be independent.

often in work and life, expectation is accompanied by disappointment, and the gap between reality and imagination leads to frustration and frustration.

No one has an obligation to know your needs and desires.

as Hung-chien said in besieged Fortress, "I'm not a worm in your belly. I know what's on your mind!"

A person should try to reduce expectations, have his own ideas, and have his own principles.

if a person expects more, he or she will be disappointed. On the contrary, the less one expects, the more surprises there will be.

I read a question on the Internet: "when will you be grateful to someone?"

the highly praised answer is one sentence: "when he does something you didn't expect."

if you do not expect to receive a gift, suddenly receive a gift; if you do not expect the leader's approval, suddenly get praise, it will be a pleasant surprise.

the more mature you are, the less you expect, the easier it is to reap surprises and gratitude.

03

mindset, getting better and better

moments read:

"this is often the case in the world. At that time, it was painful to mention, but a few years later, it was just a memory."

the reason why there is so much pain is not the thing itself, but the state of mind.

whether a thing is good or bad does not depend on the thing itself, but on the state of mind in which it is viewed.

Bob Diamond, chief executive of the Bank of England, came up with a whole new theory of leadership when he first took office.

think like a 3-year-old, making him the most outstanding CEO.

he summed up six experiences:

1. Children are energetic and enthusiasticExactly, it is exactly the dedication that a career person should have.

2. The adventurous spirit of children is to maintain a heroic attitude in their career.

3. A child's persistent concentration is a person's motivation to learn to do things.

4. The child is full of curiosity and always asks "Why?" As an adult, in the face of problems, you should ask yourself a few more reasons to avoid unnecessary risks.

5. Children are creative in doodling, and they can only succeed by breaking down the barriers of conventional thinking.

6. Children have excellent interpersonal skills, because children do not distinguish between good and bad, first kiss each other's face drooling, and then the hard heart is also softened, which is the textbook of adult interpersonal communication.

as a saying goes, "you never avoid what you do, and you have no fear in your heart. Only in this state of mind can the really strong practice."

if one wants to succeed, one must first practice his state of mind.

with a good state of mind, you can have fun in a boring life.

with a good state of mind, you can also find esoteric philosophy in simple things.

A good state of mind comes from calmness of mind, strength from heart, and courage from indomitable progress.

I have read a favorite phrase:

Life, there are joys and sorrows, life, ups and downs. Learn to wave your sleeves calmly. Optimism, it is not that there is no trouble, but to know how to be contented; there is no perfect life, twists and turns also scenery, open-minded, think through, is perfect.

people with a good state of mind will not panic, will be calm and calm, and will be free and easy to "go up in smoke between talking and laughing".