"after a trip to the vegetable market, I want to get divorced." about marriage, women should see through these three things in their life.

best friend Jojo divorced, and it took only half an hour to end her two-year marriage.

throughout the process, she was as calm as an outsider without quarreling, feeling, complaining.

looking at Qiao Qiao, who kept silent all the time, her friends could not help but start complaining:

in the face of our doubts and regrets, she finally began to explain.

she said that over the past few years of marriage, she has been responsible for all the things at home, no matter doing housework or raising children, her husband has never paid any attention to her, and even bossed her around.

every morning, she goes to the market to buy food for the whole family, but her husband has never been there with her once.

A few weekends ago, when she saw her husband resting, she wanted to ask her husband to accompany her to go shopping, but her husband said impatiently, "isn't that what you should do?" Why do I have to go with me? can you leave me alone with so little crap? "

Jojo was extremely disappointed: "this is not my business alone. You have never worried about the work at home."

who knows, my husband said angrily, "I'm the one who earns money to support my family. You eat and wear me at home all day. Shouldn't you wait on me and work for my family?"

hearing this, Jojo went out to buy vegetables without saying a word, and then filed for divorce when he got home.

Marriage life is not always romantic, but it may also be a mess.

maybe you think you've found someone to face the wind and rain with you, but in the end you find that he brought all the storm.

Marriage is not always as simple and beautiful as described in fairy tales. If you want to be happy, you should see these three truths as soon as possible.

01

whatever you do, don't lose yourself in marriage

Zhihu had a rather poignant question:

"did you really believe him when he said,'I support you'?"

among the many high praise responses, one message impressed me very much:

"listen to sweet love words, but forget about it."

these three words, although romantic, are poisons that make people lose themselves.

in the changing marriage life, there will never be once and for all. Any living marriage needs two-way interaction and mutual support.

Xiao Tong and her husband are college classmates, and they were once recognized as model couples on campus.

after falling in love for four years, they finally got their marriage license, and amid the sound of blessings, the child married himself in a high profile.

my husband entered a foreign company under the arrangement of his family. Although the work intensity is high, the salary is also very high, while the children wander around the city and have not found a satisfactory job.

before long, the child got pregnant, so he had to raise the baby at home and became a full-time wife.

my husband patted his chest and assured her:

"you can have a baby at home. Don't worry about money. I can afford to support you."

in the early days of the child's pregnancy, her husband was very considerate, and taking care of her in every detail made her life leisurely.

but after giving birth, the child is still idle at home all day, revolving around her husband and children every day, becoming more and more out of touch with the outside world, and the whole person becomes sensitive and irritable and more and more paranoid.

she is afraid of her husband having an affair, so she calls her husband to check the post when she has nothing to do. When her husband talks to her, her tone becomes more and more impatient.

they began to quarrel frequently. She accused her husband of not caring about her, while her husband said coldly, "you are not what I used to love."

the original sweet love turns out to be a chicken feather.

Li Yinhe once wrote in his book:

"Sociological theory is devoted to the issue of identity roles, proposing that a person will have multiple identities and roles.

in the face of her husband, her role is wife; in the face of children, her role is mother; in the face of parents, she also plays the role of daughter.

so among the many identities, where is that self? This is an issue that all women should pay attention to. "

self, these two words sometimes represent a kind of strength.

having self is equal to having equal capital in marriage, the right to talk equally, and the freedom to be fearless and calm in adversity.

Don't lose yourself in marriage at any time, which is a compulsory course for every woman in her life.

02

the dignity of marriage depends on one's own efforts to win

friends who have seen "Golden years" must be very impressed by Aunt Daisy who appeared in the stage.

she lives a sober, free and easy life, and she has a thorough view of marriage.

when her husband angrily asked for a divorce, she did not beg for it at all; when he wanted to go back on his promise after the divorce, she firmly refused.

all the capital of self-confidence is acquired by her accumulated efforts, and the strength brought to her by her career and her own strength makes her never take it as something that others attract and go away.

therefore, marriage is actually very realistic. All dignity and decency must be won by one's own persistence and efforts.

self-reliance, self-respect and self-love are not slogans used by girls, but the bottom line for you to live a steady life and maintain your marriage.

We all like Cinderella's fairy tales and always yearn for the love in fairy tales, but don't forget that even if you are Cinderella, you should wear your own crystal slippers if you want to go to the prince's dinner party.

classmate Xiao Jia's signature in moments has not been changed for several years. It says, "Life will never be gentle just because you are a woman."

A friend teased her: "Why are you working so hard?"Find someone to marry! "

Xiao Jia said solemnly:

"even if I meet someone I like in the future, I can still love him calmly. Whether he is rich or has nothing, I can accept him."

if he's rich, I don't think I'm superior; if he's poor, we won't be down. "

it is often said that a girl should marry the right person. But the so-called marriage to the right person, is not a body askew, leaning on another person, waiting for each other to reward.

Cai Kangyong once said:

there are no shortcuts to true happiness. Any decent marriage requires that both parties are evenly matched.

03

instead of needlessly pulling, it is better to leave gracefully

A scene in the movie "forgive him 77 times", which makes people feel very much.

the heroine and heroine finish their meal in silence, and then each do their own thing. When the hero enters the room, the camera features the tears of the heroine constantly overflowing.

the man at this time, with a look of boredom, turned to the other side, the same room, the same bed, but the two seemed to be across the Pacific Ocean.

Voltaire once said:

many people happily enter into marriage and are sure that there will be mornings and joys and sorrows for the rest of their lives. But reality tells us that marriage is a duet, and if one partner loses interest, the solo dancer has no choice but to exit.

the long-term maintenance of any marital relationship is not achieved by unilateral patient compromise. You should not only have the patience and enthusiasm to manage a happy marriage, but also the ability and courage to leave a painful relationship.

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in her later years, Zhang Youyi once said:

Zhang Youyi, who was always begging and persevering with her husband before the divorce, was afraid of doing something wrong and being disliked.

but it all proved to be futile, and finally, after the birth of his second child, Xu Zhimo handed a divorce agreement to Zhang Youyi.

after divorce, Zhang Youyi was reborn, studying abroad, practicing German, studying finance, and finally became vice president of Shanghai Women's Commercial savings Bank.

her transformation has won the respect of many people, including Xu Zhimo.

there was a popular saying on the Internet: "Love is nothing more than a rain in the eyes and an umbrella in the heart."

and what I want to say is, if you don't have the ability to hold an umbrella for the other person, please move the umbrella over your head and give yourself enough sense of security first.

what is a woman's strength?

is to be responsible for your own life; to be independent and independent; to have a steaming soul and the desire to be unwilling to be mediocre, but also to control the self-discipline of the soul and the strength to realize your wishes.

for a woman, any decency you want in marriage should be achieved by your own efforts.

only in this way can we be free from panic, cowardice, compromise and loss in marriage, and only in this way can we live calmly and love firmly.

encourage each other.