Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
someone in Zhihu once asked, "what kind of behavior in life is a sign of high EQ?"
one of the highly praised answers is: "words have a ruler, words have a degree."
speaking is an art, a good word can make a person feel like a spring breeze, a bad word can make a person fall into the cold winter instantly.
the so-called high EQ is to learn to speak well.
because behind good speech, there is a kind of kindness growing in the bottom of my heart and self-cultivation rooted in my heart.
the way you speak is also the size of your life.
A person with high EQ will never say the following six words.
Don't say anything from the bottom of your heart
listen to netizens share a bad experience.
she once chatted with a colleague in the company.
her colleague talked about the growing recession of the company and asked her what her plans were.
without much thought, Xiao Ke told her colleagues what she really thought, saying that she was going to open a small shop specializing in snacks and would resign in a few months.
unexpectedly, a few days later, her boss talked to her and said that since she was going to open a shop, she found someone to take over her job.
Xiao Ke was not only unhappy with his boss, but also forced to leave his job ahead of time.
as the old saying goes, "thorns are hidden under flowers, branches and leaves, but how can the heart be protected from poison?" The depth of the sea water in the world is known, but it is hard for people to think about it. "
although the human heart is only separated by a layer of belly, it is better than thousands of miles in this world, and it is the most difficult to see.
it is taboo to talk deeply. The secret you tell others today may become a weapon used by ta to hurt you tomorrow.
the communication between people is like a marathon, it takes a long time to see the hearts of the people, so why use up all your strength at the beginning of the show?
the heart of harm must not be, but the heart of guard against others must not be absent.
No matter how speculative it is, don't rush to talk to each other; time is the best filter that will precipitate the truest feelings.
Don't say hurtful words when angry
Jefferson said, "when you are angry, count to ten before you open your mouth, and if you are very angry, count to one hundred."
because when people are angry, they will lose their mind and say some bad things, but the consequences are irreversible.
A netizen named Chef said that the thing she regrets most is that she said mean words to her mother because she was angry.
A few years ago, the mother saw that all the children of the same age around her were married and had children, so she began to find a partner for her.
one day, her mother told her excitedly that the son of a colleague, who was only one year older than her, was excellent in all aspects and wanted to arrange for them to meet.
but that day, she happened to meet a difficult client and yelled at her mother without a fight: "this is my private matter, can you not interfere?" He is so good, why don't you marry him? "
Mother's tears fell all of a sudden, and she couldn't wait to slap herself in the face.
this is her mother's concern for her, but she is not only ungrateful, but also breaks her mother's heart.
after that, although she apologized, she always blamed herself when she thought of her mother's bewilderment that day.
there is a popular saying on the Internet: "the tongue has no bones, but it is better than any sharp weapon."
mean things always hurt the hearts of those closest to you.
the mouth is happy for a moment, and the crematorium afterwards.
an evil word to a customer may lose a business;
an evil word to a friend may ruin a friendship;
an evil word to a child may leave a shadow on ta for life.
to shut up when you are angry is not only a kind of wisdom, but also a kind of spiritual practice.
Don't complain to everyone
I have seen a shocking speech.
there is a boy who was born with a disability due to lack of oxygen in his brain, making it impossible for him to walk and speak fluently like a normal person.
he made more efforts than ordinary people and was finally admitted to a key high school.
but the headmaster kicked him out of the campus on the grounds of his disability.
on the way to apply for a job, he was repeatedly turned away because of his physical defects.
in desperation, he had no choice but to start his own business, setting up stalls and opening Internet cafes, bookstores and supermarkets.
his bookstore was burned, the supermarket was stolen, and the Internet cafe was torn down again and again.
at the lowest ebb, the online store owed a foreign debt of 4 million.
but now, he is the chairman of an e-commerce company and has been named the top 10 Internet merchants in the world by Alibaba. He has sold 4000 cheongsam pieces in one minute. He is "Mr. cheongsam" Cui Wanzhi.
talking about the past, he admitted that he had resented the injustice of fate incomparably, but no matter how much he complained, the tribulations would not be a penny less, and he could only get out of the predicament on his own.
in life, we often complain about trifles.
complaining is the most useless thing in the world.
it not only can not solve the problem, but also damages people's ambition, consumes people's energy, and makes the road of life more and more difficult.
like that sentence very much: "Life gives me honey, and I will enjoy it." When life gives me the test, I will go to battle in armor. "
without complaining, you can go farther and farther.
Don't talk crazy in front of people
in one issue of "it is you", a job seeker named Yang Xingxiang made big words as soon as he appeared on the stage.
said that he would follow the example of Su Qin in ancient times and become a good general of six entrepreneurs, using his wisdom to help entrepreneurs succeed, and offered a monthly salary of NT $90,000.
but when entrepreneurs ask him about his past achievements, he can't come up with a successful case.
when faced with the query raised by Baihe founder Mu Yan, instead of giving an explanation, he said that he would teach Mu Yan a lesson.
in the first round of voting, all the entrepreneurs present turned off the lights. As the saying goes, "Pride is the beginning of failure, and arrogance is the end of wisdom."
if a person overestimates himself, he is doomed to defeat.
you know that there are people outside the sky, and there are always better and harder people in this world.
the strength is not enough, so I like to use big words to put it together.
the low water becomes the sea, and the low man is the king. The really powerful people always hide in the heart of the word humility, leaving some leeway to turn around.
it's easy not to make promises
if there is such a person around you, you often say, "it's on me,"I'll take care of it for you every minute," and so on.
it's always easy to make a promise, but by the time you actually ask for help, ta will have forgotten all about it.
those who make light promises will have little faith.
because those promises that are easy to say are often adamant and must be difficult to fulfill.
the saddest thing is that the speaker has no intention, but the listener has left his heart.
A person with high EQ will never make a commitment easily.
because they cherish their feathers enough to squander their credibility.
knowing that there is no absolute thing in the world, if you are not completely sure, you will never dare to agree rashly.
as "Zengguang Xian Wen" said, "if you promise a person a thing, you will always have money."
once you make a promise, you bear a responsibility and never dare to betray the trust of others.
it is better to walk away in action than to make a good promise.
jokes do not expose people.
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I have heard Xu Zheng talk about the bitter history of his treatment of hair loss in his speech in the Star Sky.
he began to lose his hair violently when he was a sophomore.
in order to treat hair loss, he sought medicine everywhere and finally found a good prescription: wipe the scalp with ginger and hair lotion.
he wipes his scalp with ginger in the dormitory every day, causing redness and fever on his scalp, and then using a brush to dip hair lotion on his scalp.
every time he puts on medicine, the smell of ginger and hair lotion spreads, and someone in the dormitory corridor knocks on the washbasin and shouts "Xu Zhengzhi's hair".
once, everyone gathered around him, and when he was nervous, he spilled unboiled hair water.
one of his classmates made fun of him and said, "do you think there will be hair on the table?"
while another student echoed and replied, "if you look at his head, you can see that it doesn't work very well."
he admitted that he had suffered a lot of humiliation and ridicule in order to treat hair loss.
although he didn't say anything at the moment, he had a bad taste in his heart, and such inferiority also accompanied him for many years.
as the saying goes, "if you hit someone, don't hit him in the face."
everyone has their own restricted area, privacy and shortcomings that they don't want to be talked about.
exposing people's faults in public is like sprinkling salt on other people's festering wounds.
you think an innocuous joke may leave an indelible shadow on others.
the real self-cultivation is: even if it is a joke, do not forget to compare the kindness of the heart, when and where do not talk about personal, do not reveal the shortcomings of others.
the so-called high EQ is never how many sweet words, but can take into account the feelings of others and have the ability to sympathize with others before each opening.
if you can keep your mouth shut, it is a person's best "feng shui".
it is wisdom to be shallow and not to speak from the heart;
not to say hurtful words when angry is self-restraint;
it is open-minded to meet people without complaining;
it is humility not to say crazy things in front of people;
it is a responsibility not to make promises;
jokes do not reveal people's weaknesses, they are kind.
I wish you and I can be a person with high EQ, with kindness in the bottom of my heart, self-cultivation in my heart, and warm words in my heart.