The more right you are, the more people will offend you.

as the old saying goes:

in life, there is no absolute good or bad, there is no absolute right or wrong, everything is reasonable.

if you think something is wrong, it may not be that the thing itself is wrong, but that people have different positions and different perceptions.

blindly pursue the right, in the end, the more right you are, the more people will offend.

01

the more right you are, the more wrong things become

the famous writer Wang Xiaobo once said:

A wise man will not always haggle over which is right or wrong in some innocuous things.

Yang Jiang's "the three of us" talked about such a thing:

Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang had a quarrel on a ship going abroad, just because Qian Zhongshu mispronounced a French pronunciation.

Yang Jiang feels that Qian Zhongshu's pronunciation is accented and impure, and Qian Zhongshu is very dissatisfied.

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then Yang Jiang turned to a Frenchman on the same ship for help. As a result, Yang Jiang was right and Qian Zhongshu was wrong.

Yang Jiang recalled: "although I won, I felt boring and unhappy."

in the process of getting along with others, if you care too much about right or wrong, you are prone to quarrel, get out of control, don't choose your words, and hurt your feelings.

in a family, you can tell the difference between right and wrong with the people closest to you. The more right you are, the more scattered your feelings will be, and the family will be at odds with each other.

between friends, there is too much emphasis on right and wrong. The more right you are, the faster the friendship fades away, and the easier it is to have no friends.

Don't always try to prove yourself right, try to think from the other person's point of view.

people should learn to be flexible and leave leeway. If you are too serious, the more right you are, the more wrong you are, and the closer the disaster will be.

02

the distinction between right and wrong is annoying, and the distinction between right and wrong is hated

as Nan Huaijin, a master of Sinology, said:

some right and wrong can never be distinguished, and people hate to distinguish right from wrong, but they do not like to distinguish right from wrong too much.

in the Spring and Autumn period, Guan Zhong and Bao Shuya had a good acquaintance, but each was his master. Guan Zhong assisted Prince Jiu and Bao Shuya assisted Prince Xiaobai.

after Qi Xianggong died, Prince Jiu and Xiaobai competed for the throne. As a result, Xiaobai won and became the first Duke of Qi Huan in the Spring and Autumn period.

Duke Huan of Qi wanted to ask Bao Shuya to be prime minister, but he was refused. Bao Shuya thought that Guan Zhong had the ability to govern the country and could be competent.

under the recommendation of Bao Shuya, Guan Zhong showed his great talent and became a famous prime minister in history.

when Guan Zhong was old, Duke Huan of Qi asked, "when you die, who can take over as your prime minister?" Is Bao Shuya all right? "

I thought Guan Zhong would appreciate the kindness of Bao Shuya's recommendation and strongly recommend Bao Shuya as the prime minister, but Guan Zhong did not.

he said: "Bao Shuya cannot be a prime minister. He is too clear about right and wrong, and it is easy to make enemies in the court and form party strife.

everything in this world cannot be judged simply by right or wrong, because most people are in a state of good and bad.

whether a person becomes a good person or a bad person, only in the blink of an eye, people who are too clear about right and wrong are apt to push people who are slightly at fault into the ranks of bad guys.

people who can be prime ministers must learn to tolerate other people's unprincipled mistakes and slowly guide them to develop in a good direction, so as to form a perfect group. This is what a leader really needs to do. "

in this world, there is never an absolute distinction between right and wrong. Wise people will not only talk about right or wrong, but will grasp the right line.

people who do not distinguish between right and wrong are too easily fooled by the appearance of things, too easy to be influenced by others, and are not worthy of deep acquaintance;

people who are too divided between right and wrong care too much about the face of others and are easy to be divorced from others, and their popularity is not good.

in life, do not distinguish between right and wrong, do not be too different from right and wrong, understand others, do not be demanding, in order to be respected by others.

03

being reasonable and forgiving is a kind of broad-minded

there is an old Chinese saying:

people are not saints, who can make mistakes?

it is inevitable to make mistakes in life, never do anything, and leave leeway for yourself and others.

during the period of Emperor Xuan of the Han Dynasty, Bing Ji was prime minister and was famous for being kind to his subordinates.

once, when Bingji went out, the rickshaw driver got very drunk and vomited, soiling the seats on the bus.

Director Xicao scolded the rickshaw driver and wanted to fire him. Bingji disagreed and said, "who dares to take him in in the future?"

the rickshaw puller was grateful and then drove the bus wholeheartedly and stopped drinking.

later, when he went out, the coachman saw the rider of the post station carrying red and white cloth bags, which were urgent documents from the frontier.

the coachman guessed that something urgent must have happened at the border, so he went to the post station to inquire, and learned that the enemy had invaded Yunzhong, Daixun and other places, so he immediately informed Bingji.

at this time, Emperor Xuan of the Han Dynasty summoned the minister to inquire about the situation of Bian County. Bingji was confident and talked eloquently, and soon put forward a solution.

Emperor Xuan of the Han Dynasty praised Bingji while thinking about his job, and other ministers also admired Bingji very much.

Bingji said: "this was accidentally found out by the rickshaw driver, so I was prepared in advance." At that time, he got drunk and vomited and soiled my car seat. I forgave him, so he was more loyal to me, which is why he has this scene today. "

in interpersonal communication, there are always some people who think they are justified, think they are in power, cling to other people's mistakes, and are aggressive.

being reasonable and unforgiving, although you have won your own face, you have lost the trust and respect of others, and may even lead to disaster.

when people are reasonable, enough is enough. Don't cling to superficial victories.Learn to be considerate of others and be kind to each other.

give others a little more tolerance, that is, give yourself a way back, appreciate others more, life will be better, but also can go more long-term.

04

people often say:

if you just care about who is right and who is wrong, over time, people will become estranged and emotionally discord.

A really smart person does not cling to simple right or wrong, but cares more, treats others leniently, and lives his life calmly.